My first experience of yoga was when I was 13 years old. It didn´t have that much of an impact on me back then and for several years after. 2011 I started doing yoga every once in a while. It was a harsh point in my life and rigorious practices gave me this weird sense of calmness. It wasn´t spiritual in any way or at least that´s what I thought back then. It probably was, though, I just didn´t realize it yet. I learned to like my asanas and noticed very soon how my body reacted to the practice.
At best, I practiced maybe five times a week. Morning practice was my favorite. I got up very early and practiced for 20-30 minutes. It gave a really good start for the whole day! This text is from my old blog, just found it. It´s from 2011.
"Yesterday proved me, that a little self-discipline goes a long way.I woke up a bit earlier than normally, did a gentle, twenty-minute yoga exercise. While stretching my hey-I-just-woke-up-and-now-you-want-me-to-curseword-curseword-bend-over??? -muscles, I "mentally prepared" for my my day. I know this sounds all hippie-ish and REALLY annoying, but it really worked. Cannot think of a last time I was so ready to seize the day! I felt effective, fresh and calm. Did an hour long run also. Yikes."
Back then I was also happily surprised to see how my abs kinda *popped* and boy, I felt good about it! For some reason, a good, lean ab area was everything I had ever dreamed of going to the gym for years. And now I got it for free! I also felt how my arms grew stronger. This all happened so fast, I couldn´t believe it! I went to classes every once in a while but mostly practiced by myself. I kinda struggled with the sense of both wanting to get ahead of my body, to advance quickly, but also this restlessness that I felt while practicing home. I hardly ever felt like doing yoga more than 45 minutes max. With these feelings, after a while my body just stopped. It didn´t want to get on a mat anymore. Screw it, I thought, wisely enough. Maybe it´s just not my thing.
It took me maybe a year and a half to get back on my mat. Of course I did something every now and then, but my aim was always very physical and competitive - I wanted to work my muscles, not really concentrate on my breathing (unless really difficult asana!) and so on.
So what changed? Recently, I´ve really felt like hmm, I genuinely wanna get on a mat! But not solely because of my body. I´ll get back to that later. My spirit kinda wanted to know what yoga is all about. Union, they translate it. I feel the Union on daily basis without yoga, so why bother? I still even got the cool abs! I think my spirit wants to take over my body. Sounds a bit weird, doesn´t it? Lord only knows I´ve had severe setbacks with my body before. I still experience this weird state of contraction my diaphragm does when I´m nervous, restless or scared. It used to be a constant state I was in. Luckily and thank goodness I nowadays experience it with awareness. I can´t really remember a life without it. But right now the only thing matters is my body-mind-spirits´ wonderful co-operation trying to help my poor little diaphragm :)
And now we get back to the whole yoga topic! I feel like yoga could be something that would help my whole body to both strengthen and relax, empower it, align it with nature and letting my breathing align my body, mind and spirit together. I want to learn the natural state of my being, if you know what I mean. Any impact it has on my outer appearance...I just don´t care anymore. Although it would be empowering to feel stronger. I don´t even care about being able to do splits, headstands, scorpion pose -yep, all of those things that my ego wanted to accomplish.
I´m not sure where this journey will take me! Yet I´m nothing but curious :) It would be lovely to have you guys with me on this journey. I´ll definitely keep some kind of a diary about this process. I don´t wanna make any plans or programs for my practice. Even 10-15 minutes a day is super if that´s my entities wish for that day. Breathing is the first thing I wanna concentrate on. Letting my prana move without blocks and without effort. Letting it soothe me and make room for my being. I wish this could be something that would make me flourish instead of being a burden.
Listening to my daily changing need, listening to the state I´m constantly in, listening the sound of my own breathing resonating with everything. Yep, that´s about it. Nothing more, nothing less.
At best, I practiced maybe five times a week. Morning practice was my favorite. I got up very early and practiced for 20-30 minutes. It gave a really good start for the whole day! This text is from my old blog, just found it. It´s from 2011.
"Yesterday proved me, that a little self-discipline goes a long way.I woke up a bit earlier than normally, did a gentle, twenty-minute yoga exercise. While stretching my hey-I-just-woke-up-and-now-you-want-me-to-curseword-curseword-bend-over??? -muscles, I "mentally prepared" for my my day. I know this sounds all hippie-ish and REALLY annoying, but it really worked. Cannot think of a last time I was so ready to seize the day! I felt effective, fresh and calm. Did an hour long run also. Yikes."
Back then I was also happily surprised to see how my abs kinda *popped* and boy, I felt good about it! For some reason, a good, lean ab area was everything I had ever dreamed of going to the gym for years. And now I got it for free! I also felt how my arms grew stronger. This all happened so fast, I couldn´t believe it! I went to classes every once in a while but mostly practiced by myself. I kinda struggled with the sense of both wanting to get ahead of my body, to advance quickly, but also this restlessness that I felt while practicing home. I hardly ever felt like doing yoga more than 45 minutes max. With these feelings, after a while my body just stopped. It didn´t want to get on a mat anymore. Screw it, I thought, wisely enough. Maybe it´s just not my thing.
It took me maybe a year and a half to get back on my mat. Of course I did something every now and then, but my aim was always very physical and competitive - I wanted to work my muscles, not really concentrate on my breathing (unless really difficult asana!) and so on.
So what changed? Recently, I´ve really felt like hmm, I genuinely wanna get on a mat! But not solely because of my body. I´ll get back to that later. My spirit kinda wanted to know what yoga is all about. Union, they translate it. I feel the Union on daily basis without yoga, so why bother? I still even got the cool abs! I think my spirit wants to take over my body. Sounds a bit weird, doesn´t it? Lord only knows I´ve had severe setbacks with my body before. I still experience this weird state of contraction my diaphragm does when I´m nervous, restless or scared. It used to be a constant state I was in. Luckily and thank goodness I nowadays experience it with awareness. I can´t really remember a life without it. But right now the only thing matters is my body-mind-spirits´ wonderful co-operation trying to help my poor little diaphragm :)
And now we get back to the whole yoga topic! I feel like yoga could be something that would help my whole body to both strengthen and relax, empower it, align it with nature and letting my breathing align my body, mind and spirit together. I want to learn the natural state of my being, if you know what I mean. Any impact it has on my outer appearance...I just don´t care anymore. Although it would be empowering to feel stronger. I don´t even care about being able to do splits, headstands, scorpion pose -yep, all of those things that my ego wanted to accomplish.
I´m not sure where this journey will take me! Yet I´m nothing but curious :) It would be lovely to have you guys with me on this journey. I´ll definitely keep some kind of a diary about this process. I don´t wanna make any plans or programs for my practice. Even 10-15 minutes a day is super if that´s my entities wish for that day. Breathing is the first thing I wanna concentrate on. Letting my prana move without blocks and without effort. Letting it soothe me and make room for my being. I wish this could be something that would make me flourish instead of being a burden.
Listening to my daily changing need, listening to the state I´m constantly in, listening the sound of my own breathing resonating with everything. Yep, that´s about it. Nothing more, nothing less.