Just arrived to my parents´ place at the country-side. It´s only 25 minutes from hubby´s place and since my parents spend little time here, it´s my go-to -place when I need some R&R. The dogs love it here also. There´s plenty of room to play around, a huge yard, fields and forest as far as the eye can see...My grandma build this place and lived here for thirty years. Every time I come here I can sense this welcoming, loving atmosphere. Though she was NOT this loving, gentle granny, rather a fierce, chain-smoking, leopard-leggings-wearing anti-granny. And yeas, there was no way of calling her gran! Ha. I remember once trying, not good.
I´ve been working, a lot. Yesterday 12 hours straight, phew. I was feeling rather exhausted, but now, staying here, I can feel my energy starting to rush again. Did some gardening with the dogs, and now they´re all relaxed and happy. And so am I.
There are a few subjects in my life that I´ve been struggling with. Things my mind would definitely love to solve as quickly as possible. There are days when I wish I could only write! Sing. Draw. Walk in the woods. Simple living, complex eating, lots of loving. We thought that a vacation of some sort would have happened already but wow, suddenly it´s springtime and all we have done is this basic, somewhat struggling everyday living of ours. Things are about to change...actually, in June, huge things are about to happen. Yet we don´t know how much an effect it has on our daily lives. It´s both exciting and EXCITING at the same time! Good things, for sure, but the effect...no clue whatsoever yet!
What Spring 2014 has taught me is that yes, you can do all the planning in the world, but there´s still gonna be the Ever Present Surprise Factor called Life is Happening, every second, every minute, flows like a river and you just better flow with it...not passively, though. Mindful flowing :)
I held a Mindfullness class yesterday, feeling like a total fraud driving there, being all stressed out and tired. Even angry! Realizing again, that life IS happening, all the time, every single day. With all this (well, it feels like chaos anyway, probably isn´t!) chaos we´re going through, we´re more or less just striving to maintain this sense of control. Any way possible! Letting go is usually the ultimate answer to anything. Letting go is not the same as giving up. It´s more like de-clenching your teeth and just breathing, sighing, and - again and again and again - opening your eyes to reality. Being thankful, speaking that universal language of god, every day. Crying, if necessary. Cause you´re a human! Maybe even screaming. Then breathing, letting go, and moving along with the stream. Letting go, gently, and taking the right responsibility.
Have a great week - or at least good enough ;)